The tongue, an array of muscles and nerves… is the most versatile sex organ we possess. We can touch, taste, and lick with it…. [it] is the instrument that lets us speak many languages, foremost among them the language of love.

- Chapter 5 The Tongue is Mightier Than the Sword

I read a lot of non-fiction. I mostly read business books. So, it was with great pleasure that I picked up and read “She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman,” a book by sex therapist Ian Kerner. And to my surprise, it was not only a good instruction manual, but a great read.

What Attracts You?

Like me, you may be initially attracted to the book by the cover. The book, pictured on the right, features a ripe delicious looking papaya (a euphemism in Latin cultures for a woman’s genitalia) with a blurred out banana in the background. It catches your eye, and, personally, in looking at this juicy fruit, I quickly and completely realized why I always heard my Cuban friends joke about wanting some “papaya!”

Its juicy insides, when split in half, reveal many layers of fleshy fruit wrapped around a seedy center – at the top, near the place where the fruit originally connected to the tree – a circle of skin, a shaft, a button, resembling the head or crown of the clitoris.

I’m getting hungry.

But, as I would come to find out in the first few pages, the clitoris, is NOT a button!

Should You Read She Comes First?

Yes!

Okay, let’s break this down:

Women

Let’s take care of you first . See, I do learn quickly. Are you a woman considering reading this book? Not sure if you want to brave that long walk from the “sex” section of borders to the check out area and risk bumping into a colleague? Well, it’s worth it (and besides you can always order the book on amazon!). If you’re still unconvinced, just ask yourself…

Do you WANT TO COME MORE?!

Of course you do! I do, and I have never met anyone that has said “you know what… I am coming WAY too much” especially women. Except maybe this one woman I dated . Every time we had sex she could not stop shaking.

Getting on track.

So my advice is all women should definitely read she comes first, or in the very least your man should read it and then he should communicate just a few interesting facts to you. For example:

On average, women reach climax less than 1/3 of the time during sex. But, when partners spend just 20 minutes or more on foreplay women are able to reach orgasm nearly 93% of the time.

What the f@$#!!! 20 minutes, is nothing for an almost GAURANTEED happy, squirming, smiling woman.

Men – Why You Need to Read This Book

I consider myself a thinking man. So the subtitle – along with the dripping fruit – definitely caught my eye. As it may as well do for you guys out there considering picking up the book. Before I get to the specific reasons why you (men) should read this book, I’d like to point out something I’ve noticed in my life.

Have you ever noticed that women love sex? I mean, if you have ever had a friend that is a girl and talked to her for more than 30 minutes, sex always comes up. AND, if you’ve had the pleasure of a couple of girls as friends I’m sure you’ve been shocked to hear about all of their sexual exploits.

BUT more importantly (and surprisingly!) how open women are about sex, revealing every intimate detail with their adventures in penis mountain climbing (what I call sex) or spelunking (lesbian sex).

After getting over this initial shock (realizing that there are probably at least a few dozen women that know how big you are and how you were in bed) if you’re like me, you realize that men really aren’t the more sexual gender.

I think it’s pretty even, and we have different ways of expressing our sexuality and becoming turned on, but I bet you never shared the details of a one-night stand with a friend. You have probably just answered the question… “Did you get it?”

Hell yeah you got it!

But that’s where the sharing ends. And that’s where this book sort of picks up.

It is a terrific combination of wonderful prose, scientific data, amazing quotes, historical references and (finally and perhaps most importantly for us guys) a manual on how to please your woman. Besides, women will find it sexier that you are taking responsibility for your own sexuality, and are looking for ways to please them (and yourself) more!

And at the end of the day, I’m sure you’ll agree there is NOTHING as sexy as when YOU GIVE your woman an orgasm:

I love to make my girlfriend come. I love to experience the whole thing – the buildup of ecstasy, the spasm of satisfaction, the momentary loss of self. It turns me on even more to know I made it happen. (David, 27)

This month: